Life is a Garden

I spent some time in my struggling vegetable garden after work today, attempting to harvest a few green beans from the pest-infested plants. Nothing seems to be growing well this year, except for the mutant fig tree in the center of the garden. Originally, the tree was in a large pot on our deck. But that was several years ago, and when the dog started chewing the bark off every spring, we moved it to the enclosed garden area. I planted it in the center as a focal point and thought it would be a nice addition. Little did I know the thing would explode and more than triple in size in just one year. Now it's practically taken over the garden, shading the areas where I used to plant sunny vegetables and threatening to swamp everything.

As I fought off the mosquitoes, I looked about at the growing shaded areas and lamented a similar problem in my life. It seems that things beyond my control threaten to take over my very existence. Every day, I feel as if I have no say in what I do or in how I spend my time. I am a slave to the alarm clock in the morning, to work during the day, to the schedules of my husband and children, my church and my house. I spend my "free time" hassling on the telephone with insurance companies, banks, repair services, Internet providers, and doctors' offices. The areas in which I have tried to plant new things--writing books, sewing, carpentry--are stunted by the looming shade. I want to fight back, but I don't know where to begin.

Today, I signed up my kids for fall recreational soccer. It's something they've done for years. And yet, I had a heavy heart. I knew that signing up meant my weekends were gone for the fall. Now that they are in different leagues, one has games on Saturday and the other has games on Friday nights and Sunday afternoons. Every week. Plus at least one practice for each child during weeknights. Plus school.

I thought about dropping soccer for this year, but it's about the only exercise they get. And they love it, which is good since most exercise isn't fun. They also learn teamwork and sportsmanship. But it's a lot of running back and forth for the parents--mostly me.

When they were babies, I thought that life would be easier and less harried when they grew older. But I didn't realize how much activity kids have. And mine aren't really as busy as most of the other kids I see around here. We try to limit. But still--two kids with two working parents makes for a busy household.

So where to cut back? I make tons of extra trips to the store each week, and I know there ought to be a way to minimize that. But no matter how many lists I make, it seems I'm always having to go to this store or that to get just a couple of things extra.

A few years ago, we made a concerted effort to consolidate all our doctors, etc. in the area close to home to save time and gas. It has helped, but as we age, and our kids age, the number of times we have to see the doctor/dentist/optometrist/orthodontist/hairdresser grows. Our hairdresser now only works 3 days a week, not on weekends at all, so she's very hard to even get an appointment with. This weekend, I'm spending more than half of my Saturday driving to the other side of the county to get my hair highlighted by a former hairdresser since I can't get in to see mine for at least a month!

I don't want to cut down the fig tree or even move it. I just want to prune it where it will still bear figs but not overshadow the rest of the garden. I realize that pruning the tree will, in fact, make it more productive. I just wish I had the vision, wisdom, and guts to do the same for me.